Pushing Your Teens Into A Particular College Major

Dearest Parents,

As our teens prepare to leave home for college, the pressure can feel overwhelming. We want the best for them, and we often believe that pushing them into a particular college major is the key to their success. 

But is it really?

Before we answer that question, let's take a moment to reflect on why we might feel compelled to steer our teens in a specific direction when it comes to their academic pursuits. 

• Perhaps we believe that certain majors lead to more lucrative careers or greater prestige. 
• Maybe we're projecting our own unfulfilled dreams onto our children, hoping they'll achieve what we never could. 
• Or, it could be that we simply want to protect them from making what we perceive as "wrong" choices.

But here's the thing: pushing our teens into a particular college major is not only unhelpful – it can also be damaging.

1. It sends the message that their interests, passions, and talents don't matter as much as our own expectations.
2. It robs them of the opportunity to explore different paths, make mistakes, and discover who they truly are.

Instead of pushing our teens into a specific major, let's empower them to make their own choices.

My oldest daughter, India, dove into engineering. My middle daughter, Iman, decided to pursue medicine and my high school junior, Ivonna, came home, looked me in the eyes and said, “I wouldn’t mind having homework in computer science every night!!”

Although I initially thought medication 💊 was needed, I raised my hands 🤷🏽‍♀ and said, “let’s make it happen.” After learning their interests, it was a no-brainer to encourage them to explore their curiosities, follow their passions, and pursue paths that align with their unique strengths and values. Let's remind our teens that success is not defined by a degree or a job title, but by the fulfillment and happiness they find along the way.

Of course, this doesn't mean we should abandon our role as guides and mentors. We can still offer guidance, support, and encouragement as our teens navigate the college application process and explore their options. But let's do so with an open mind and a willingness to listen. 

Let's ask questions like,

• "What are you passionate about?"
• "What kind of impact do you want to make in the world?"

Let's help them think critically about their choices and consider the long-term implications of their decisions.

In the end, our teens' college majors should be a reflection of who they are, not who we want them to be. By supporting them in finding their own paths, we give them the greatest gift of all – the freedom to be themselves.

With love and encouragement,

Xoxo